Quotes

Serenity asks you: All I want is frickin honeycombs with frickin laser beam on their heads... is that too much to ask?

--An improvement the witches' spell will never see, most likely

You feel that your skill in using the wind to drive a sticky glob into an opponent's face has increased.

--Gotta love those air TMs

You feel more able to deal with balls flying at you than before.

--Useful at parties, that is

Augusta tells you: Well, the Son of God has impeccable taste in clothes and boyfriends, that's for sure. And he sure shows a lot of leg :P

--That'll get me to church

Karek tells you: cute rose, bitch *laugh*
You tell Karek: Ooh, you've got a way with words. :)
Karek tells you: I know *strut*

--Valentine's Day takes on a whole new meaning

> Archangel and the proud black duck leave south.
>You jealously watch a man with a duck on his head, as he walks past.

--Coincidence?

Carnage wisps: "You spot a child sucking a raw carrot. Yuck"?
CrusadeR wisps: *giggle* pervert!
Jhn wisps: Maybe you don't like raw carrots?
SqEaL wisps: was the child female?
Eustacia wisps: but carrots have ridges!
PncessAmy wisps: For your sucking pleasure.
Eustacia wisps: er.....not that i would know about them.....*coughs*
Rasputin wisps: *has a heart attack when he looks at the conversation*
PncessAmy wisps: Hey, we're just discussing veggies here. :)
Eustacia wisps: Well, they are affordable...*decides to shut up before she incriminates herself further*
SqEaL wisps: veggiez, sex toyz, wutz the difference? :P
Daisilodavi wisps: *is a willing cucumber*
Rasputin wisps: Well, nobody discusses veggies quite like you I suppose ;)
PncessAmy wisps: Besides, we haven't even started discussing cukes yet.
PncessAmy wisps: Yeah, you should see how I talk about kale.
Josie wisps: mmmmm, lettuce.
Eustacia wisps: And no matter what deo says about asparagus, it isn't true I tell you!
Daisilodavi wisps: to limp and thin :P
SqEaL wisps: yes it am eust, i was watching
PncessAmy wisps: Eus, noone's stalk is as big as they claim here anyway.
PncessAmy wisps: stalk of asparagus, that is. :)
Daisilodavi wisps: asparagus i mena, and after it's steamd it doesn't taste like anything but rotten cabbage *stops talking about cooking*
Rasputin wisps: I don't want to KNOW how big anyone's stalk is
Eustacia wisps: amy....so true.....so tr......er....hey, um..not like I have been checking out DW stalks....*coughs*
Daisilodavi wisps: *pats eust on the head patronizingly*clear sky.
[someone, accidentally deleted]: It's too bad BeamStalk isn't on for this.
SqEaL wisps: the fruit and veggie shop sellz kukumberz :)
Eustacia wisped: Some men on here do have impressive stalks though....hrmrhrm
SqEaL wisped: that that do eust...nice and large :)
SqEaL wisped: erm....they :P
PncessAmy wisped: yeah, I just hate advertising 12" stalks of asparagus, then you go buy them and they are really gherkins.
Rasputin wisped: I would think that anyone with a 12" stalk of asparagus wouldn't HAVE to advertise
Rue wisped: just a minor point.. gherkins are pickles. Made from cucumbers, not asparagus :P
SqEaL wisped: kinky rue ;)
PncessAmy wisped: Yeah, I know that...but didn't feel like backspacing. :P
Daisilodavi wisped: *promises huge giagantic stocks, abotu bigs as a person's skull, but are only midly shocked when i deliver ones about the size of a wrist
Rue wisped: a likely story
Mansarde wisped: yeah, PNsesame. never let the facts get in the way of a good moan :)
PncessAmy wisped: Not that I'm a pickle expert or anything. We even eat pickled okra down here.
SqEaL wisped: rue knowz alllll about kukumberz ;)
Delta wisped: I like pickled okra... Mmmmm :)
PncessAmy wisped: I never do, Mansarde! Open, Pnsesame! *giggle*
Carnage wisped: pickled eggs did someone say?
Delta wisped: Batter fried okra isn't too bad either
CrusadeR wisped: if thats what you want to call it.
DemonBoy wisped: the magic imporiam sells pickles eyes and carrots.....erm.....i guess thats kinda on the subject
SqEaL wisped: the fruit and veggie shop sellz kukumberz :)
Daisilodavi wisps: *picles amy for safekeeping* ooohhhhh, wrinkly :)
PncessAmy wisps: I'm not *that* old, thank you very much.
SqEaL wisps: oOOok!

--Just another normal talker conversation...

PncessAmy wisps: I don't think there's anything we can't twist into a sick sexual joke.

--Stating the obvious...

Karek wisps: the only thing that saved me was my Unbreakable Socks of Death

--Well, thank God for them, then.

Twitty wisps: Okay hypothetical for you, your a woman with this pill and you want to start a sperm bank of the most influential male people in the world. So you give the high influential men the pill to encourage them because their usually so old that they don't think about it much, well okay they think about it, but the don't have it. So it's for starting a bank
Aki wisps: Members Of The Same Sex
Cadderly wisps: why would i want a member of the same sex?
Roaishna wisps: Not members of my own sex, i'm for members of the opposite sex being MOTSS though :)
Delta wisps: What sort of interest does the bank pay? Is it tax sheltered? Is it FDIC insured?
Twitty wisps: Nope, but it's well covered :)
Roaishna wisps: is there an ATM? A driver through teller?
Delta wisps: And I'm not even going to ask about the penalties for early withdrawl...

--But would they call it Bing's?

(cre) Drakkos: A bad workman always blames his tool. *tsk*
(cre) Shrike: I'm not blaming my tool for anything.

--The Boys of Discworld

(cre) Tannah: Apparently that's the same as read all. My pair of incredibly big hooters does not have anything written on it, incidentally.
(cre) Tannah: Oh. Bugger. Mis-cre. :)
(cre) Valentijn really didn't want to ponder Tannah's hooters :P
(cre) Saffra: I thought only Shrike had the incredibly big hooters...
(cre) Tannah: I owe my hooters to Shrike, of course. :)

--Shrike, plastic surgeon to the stars?

(cre) Rhinehold: ok, how exactly do I use the library for 'checks' rather than quest completion...
(cre) Jeremy: Like stages?
(cre) Saffra thought that said "chicks".
(cre) Taffyd: Here's one for you Jeremy! > Onikage wisps: what is the domain of Sur?
(cre) Jeremy: "Hey, baby, want to come upstairs and see my library?"
(cre) Jeremy grins.
(cre) Rhinehold: Hey, I asked that before I applied... :)
(cre) Saffra: Wanna check out my stacks?
(cre) Rhinehold: errr, the sur thing, not the 'come upstairs thing'
(cre) Taarna: ooer
(cre) Tannah: Are you well stacked then, our Saffra?
(cre) Saffra: Just ask Taarna and Presto :)
(cre) Saffra: Darn, Presto left, you'll have to ask Taarna.
(cre) Jeremy: OK, I'm asking...
(cre) Tannah: I thought I had a pair of incredibly big hooters, but they only weigh four pounds. :(
(cre) Tannah blames Shrike.
(cre) Jeremy: How do you weigh them?
(cre) Wenda blinks as she starts paying attention to cre.
(cre) Tannah: Big as Denmark, he said. Hah.
(cre) Tannah: I took them off and weighed them, of course.
(cre) Jeremy: Ah, the detachable kind.
(cre) Tannah: You heft a pair of incredibly big hooters and guess that it weighs about four pounds.
(cre) Wenda: lol
(cre) Taarna: i know nothing of anyone's hooters
(cre) Tannah: We were discussing her stacks, Taarna.
(cre) Taarna: not even mine, i swear
(cre) Terano pushes Tannah
(cre) Terano pushes Tannah's stacks
(cre) Terano: too :P
(cre) Taarna: nope, nope, ignorance is bliss
(cre) Tannah: HER stacks. My incredibly big (but lightweight!) hooters. Or Shrike's, rather.
(cre) Taarna: 4 lbs total, or each?
(cre) Valentijn: inflatable?
(cre) Tannah: And the seemingly complete lack of any bos, daggers or other related weapons.
(cre) Tannah: The pair is 4 lbs, I'm afraid. They must be inflated, with helium no less, since they're as big as Denmark and see so light.
(cre) Tannah: Er, still so light, rather.
(cre) Taarna: gods, they can SEE?
(cre) Jeremy: As big as Denmark individually, or together?
(cre) Tannah: Together. :)
(cre) Valentijn: can you float around?
(cre) Jeremy: Oh, well :(
(cre) Saffra: Too bad your hooters never see the light of day...
(cre) Terano: your lucky I didnt around to popping them :)
(cre) Taarna wonders about Jeremy's standards, then
(cre) Taffyd: I bet it'll be 30 seconds before we start getting into (.)(.) and (o)(o) :P
(cre) Tannah: Oh, hang on. If I put some roast childe in them they gain weight. :)
(cre) Valentijn: i think we're already there :P
(cre) Terano: Ive seen (O) (O) before :P
(cre) Jeremy: Oblong aereola?
(cre) Terano: I think it was shrike :P
(cre) Tannah very carefully avoids mention of (*)(*).
(cre) Taarna: are those pasties?
(cre) Rhinehold: well, that's easy, when the call you want to make on a new handler is actually WRITTEN into the helpfile... :)
(cre) Jeremy: Headlights.
(cre) Tannah: Are what pasties?
(cre) Taffyd: I can anticipate everything that happens on this MUD. ;PP

--Creators at work as usual

You tell Akasha de Nada, Presto and Tela: Darn, "screw Oreo" doesn't work to put it back together...er...that is...
Presto tells Akasha de Nada, Tela and you: Well, I have never been able to manage it in real life

--The wonders of liaison toys

Presto: Fuck! Fuuuuuuck!
Me: Ha! You don't know the meaning of the word!
Presto [thoughtful pause]: You're probably right.

--Video games and deep thoughts

[lataub killed by insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch>insect <Klatch>insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch> insect <Klatch>]
(cre) Valentijn: nah, it was the malaria that got him in the end

--Always get your vaccinations before going overseas

You tell Saffra d'Licious: good! it's prolly out of my bugger by now
You tell Saffra d'Licious: BUFFER
Saffra d'Licious grins at you.
You slap your forehead and exclaim: D'oh! at Saffra d'Licious.
Saffra d'Licious teases you.
You ask Saffra d'Licious: you just copied that, didn't you?

--Submitted by Taarna. Infamous already?

Taffyd: Oh come on, it's only a game, it's not like it's the MUD or anything.

--Submitted by Twiggy

Triana wisps: heh... Condom Day wouldbe interested :)
Triana wisps: would be interesting,even :)
Mansarde wisps: not really. we don't have any contraceptives coded at all, actually.
Egypt wisps: They could be a bright pink color, and leap into other peoples' hair
Mansarde wisps: i guess we rely on the rhythm method, or something :)

--Mansarde teaching birth control for Discies

PncessAmy wisped: Besides, I don't think it's that easy to type like an idiot all the time. :P
PncessAmy wisped: Well, nevermind, Ringoosu does it. :P
Ringoosu wisped: Excuse me?
PncessAmy wisped: Oh! *rofl* Hey Ringoosu!
Ringoosu wisped: What did I do to deserve criticism and ridicule?
PncessAmy wisped: Well, I think birth was where it started, hon?

--"qwho" is such a useful command

Yunzil wisped: Oh give me a home, where the cabbages roam, and the frogs and the pink fish all play, where dogs glow bright green, and seldom is seen a creator around here all day....
Thiaf wisped: we all live in the froggy discworld froggy discworld froggy discworld
Yunzil wisped: Someday we'll find it -- a better connection, the laggers, the spammers, and meeee

--Discworld theme songs!

Maya wisps: No, it wasn't you Ian, because you suck.
Ian wisps: I don't think so- I once killed 7, with one blowe!
Baines wisps: that's just because you don't use mouthwash
Maya wisps: I'm not interested in your sex life.

The cockroach jerks off in a strange direction.

--Even the bugs are pervs here. Submitted by Awful.

[anni killed by taking the Miracle Cure <anni>]

--Think it'll woik? It'd take a miracle.

(cre) Presto calls add_skill_level("other.holding.alcohol", 1000) saffra

I tried to smell foul ole ron and his terrier, and i was told i couldn't. now surely this is wrong on so many lvls?

--Calis

> smell ron
You cannot smell Foul Ole Ron.

Surely, surely this is incorrect?

--Djan

--Great minds bugrep alike

Poptot wisps: Discworld: the one place where you can finger a god. :)

(cre) Valentijn wonders how one goes about measuring nipples.
(cre) Que decides to remain quiet for a bit.
(cre) Cerisa thinks that's wise :)
(cre) Archana: generally the lords offer to critique them, Valentijn
(cre) Valentijn: ahhh
(cre) Jeremy: I always look for length and diameter.
(cre) Valentijn: not firmness or colour?
(cre) Jeremy: Endcap is a distinctive feature, too.
(cre) Pinkfish: colour is my department :)
(cre) Valentijn: your nipples?
(cre) Archana: Yah the High lord's critique colour
(cre) Valentijn: do they have to take a class in advanced nipple critique before they can move on from length and diameter to colour
(cre) Jeremy: No, just an oral test

Taarna tells you: hrm..my nuts are broken

You tell Shrike d'Bastard: Er...you were having sex with the playstation? Creative.
Shrike d'Bastard tells you: well hey, it's easy to find the right buttons to press on a playstation.

--Perhaps you're not reading the instruction manual correctly?

Akuma mudsex's you, you prolly dont remember since you were in a coma while contemplating, you liked it at the time though.

--Submitted by Leeda.

(cre) Rue: Things you find in a field besides water buffalo dung: __________
(cre) Lemming: Water buffalo.

--Thinking laterally